I realized that I don't dislike what happens in Dawntrail, but the dialogue used in the story.
Wuk Lamat isn't annoying because of her deeds, ideals, thoughts and presence, but because she constantly spams the same sentences over and over.
I don't get the style of writing where they have her say "we need to understand each other", "i want peace and people to be happy" 25 times throughout the story. Say it once, and then through your deeds and actions show it.
"We need to learn more about each other" could simply be replaced by her actually asking questions about the people she wants to learn more about. You don't have to pronounce your intentions and feelings, just act on them.
Same with other characters. For example I caught the twins saying "we want to learn more so we can help Garlemald" at least 5 times. Why the fuck do they need to spam that and explain themselves like they are reminding the audience of their purpose. Just fucking do it. Just say "I wish to stay longer here", and that is it.
Or another thing is how many fucking times characters have to organize and split the group. Just think how many times we had Alphinaud or whoever say "ok I will go here with X, and you go with Y here". Why? Just say "lets split up and search the area".
Krile and Alphinaud also often talk about the places we visit in a manner of a writer who explains the setting in their pitch. Like they are afraid that we will miss things and need to really hammer in the purpose behind everything.
I feel like with this the script breaks the 4th wall, and the characters are reminding you what their purpose in the story is, how the scene is going to play out and what message the writers want to drill into you.
submitted by /u/papanak94
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Wuk Lamat isn't annoying because of her deeds, ideals, thoughts and presence, but because she constantly spams the same sentences over and over.
I don't get the style of writing where they have her say "we need to understand each other", "i want peace and people to be happy" 25 times throughout the story. Say it once, and then through your deeds and actions show it.
"We need to learn more about each other" could simply be replaced by her actually asking questions about the people she wants to learn more about. You don't have to pronounce your intentions and feelings, just act on them.
Same with other characters. For example I caught the twins saying "we want to learn more so we can help Garlemald" at least 5 times. Why the fuck do they need to spam that and explain themselves like they are reminding the audience of their purpose. Just fucking do it. Just say "I wish to stay longer here", and that is it.
Or another thing is how many fucking times characters have to organize and split the group. Just think how many times we had Alphinaud or whoever say "ok I will go here with X, and you go with Y here". Why? Just say "lets split up and search the area".
Krile and Alphinaud also often talk about the places we visit in a manner of a writer who explains the setting in their pitch. Like they are afraid that we will miss things and need to really hammer in the purpose behind everything.
I feel like with this the script breaks the 4th wall, and the characters are reminding you what their purpose in the story is, how the scene is going to play out and what message the writers want to drill into you.
submitted by /u/papanak94
[link] [comments]
Continue reading...