My brother suddenly passed away last month on June 29, 2024.
His funeral is tomorrow, and it's been difficult brining up this topic.
He introduced me to the world of online gaming and even bought me my first PC to play games together.
On Christmas 2015, he introduced me to FFXIV.
Together, we've had so much fun and made many memories back in 2.X
The most notable fun we had was just messing around in T9 as a 4 man party.
He loved the Aurum Vale dungeon and the World of Darkness alliance raid, as well as the Coils.
They were challenging back then and were a lot of fun!
Eventually he stopped playing while I continued on for a while.
Come the Shadowbringers expansion, I got to reintroduce FFXIV to him and on his birthday, a brand new gaming computer.
He was depressed, had to put his dog, Arctic, down (old age, memory loss, in pain, and could no longer stand), and was going through a lot of things during this time as well.
FFXIV helped with the depression, and eventually we (he) got a new dog, Mystik, a rescue, she (Mystik) rescued him brining him out of depression fully!
Tyrn Ashenshield (Halicarnassus), is his ingame character.
It was a completely different game back then in 2.X and there are so many new jobs now.
Because I had been playing for a while, I got to teach and give some pointers to him as he did when I first joined.
Together, we started our adventure once again.
Playing through each expansion, he loved the combat, the more challenging, the better.
He loved the stories, from MSQ to the Side Quests and even the seasonal and collaboration events, each quest is enjoyable and contained so much information.
He loved the Easter eggs, referencing the other Final Fantasy games, reminding him of adventures and the fun and the love he had for Final Fantasy.
And he loved the community, so many communities from the hunts to pvp to eureka and even random ones found in party finder, it made the game fun connecting so many people together.
During the Shadowbringers expansion, he found out that some of his irl friends also played FFXIV.
They were once again reunited and together a new chapter, a new adventure had started.
He use to play PLD, and came to love and have fun playing as a MCH as his main.
All the other jobs were enjoyable, but he had the most fun as a MCH.
The Nier raids are one of his favorites, he loved it!
Having so much fun and no longer depressed, he enjoyed everything!
Endwalker is now about to be released soon.
Everyone decided we form a new FC on Dynamis so we could all be part of the same FC.
Eventually he purchased a personal home for the first time and decorated it with references from our first FC we made together when he rejoined.
He had fun and enjoyed every moment of the game and the company he had with the FC, all the way to the end.
Sadly life is cruel.
It was during this time, that he was diagnosed with a type of rare nasal cancer.
Being misdiagnosed at first as his doctor thought it was allergies.
Allergies causing inflammation in his nose, but allergy medication was not working.
It wasn't going away and appeared to get a lot larger, and now a biosy was done, and it was a tumor.
He got referred to a specialist to get the cancer removed and treated.
During this time, we got another rescue dog, Dakota, and he fell in love with him (Dakota).
A few months later it was time to get it removed and by then the tumor had protruded out of his nostril.
Radiation therapy was done later on to prevent the cancer from relapsing.
After surgery and radiation therapy, he never became the same again.
Weakened and had less energy, but still had the love for FFXIV even when he was in a care facility.
Being at home now, he can enjoy Endwalker to its fullest!
He fell in love with Eureka and Island Sanctuary and always had a blast when it comes to Hunt Trains.
Glamours became something that needed to be worked on, it was a never ending quest to find that perfect single piece of armor.
At the end of Endwalker, it is such an outstanding expansion, we don't even know if the next expansion could beat it.
One of the best games that he has ever played!
Getting updated about Dawntrial, we became excited and can't wait to start a brand new adventure.
He fell ill again, with walking pneumonia for about 2 months.
Again, it was misdiagnosed by his doctor, thinking it was just a cold (that lasted for a month now).
Cough medication did nothing, and he went in again, this time getting X-Rayed and diagnosed with walking pneumonia.
Treatment went well, but on top of still being weakened by the cancer treatment, he was also fighting an infection in the lungs.
His body healing slowly, he's even more tired and can't do much, but even still the love for FFXIV was unwavering.
The updates about Dawntrail got him even more excited, seeing sneak peaks on new jobs, new zones, new dungeons, new races, and a new adventure.
Still excited, but he became weaker all of a sudden.
Being unable to concentrate.
Feeling tried and lethargic.
Being unable to sleep and having insomnia.
Being unable to lie down on his own bed, he resorted to sleeping on his chair or couch while sitting.
This went on for a good while, until he finally visited his doctor.
A new symptom occurred, swollen legs.
His doctor mentioned the swollen legs was due to sleeping while sitting for a long period of time.
And the fatigue to be vitamin D deficiency and recovery from the walking pneumonia.
He was treated with a diuretic and vitamin D supplement.
But during this when all of this was happening, he could no longer concentrate to play FFXIV.
Couldn't do much of anything without getting extremely tired, and could not walk properly too.
For about a week, two weeks, he got some what better.
And then the symptoms came back even worse.
Thinking he got sick, he tried to avoid family members so that we don't contract what he got just in case it was transmissible.
This was during the week Dawntrail early access was to be released.
He can't even play FFXIV anymore, not enough energy and can't keep concentration, but excited to continue his adventure when he got better.
On the day before early access, he collapsed outside in the backyward alone.
No one knew until he regained consciousness and went back inside to get treated for his injuries.
He went to get cleaned up by taking a shower, that was when he collapsed again, in the shower.
This time, I had to call emergency services while our mother stayed by his side.
A possible seizure this time, non convulsive, tense body, and hyperventilating.
At that time we didn't know what was going on other than he passed out twice.
Thankfully he regained consciousness right before fire department arrived.
Rushed to the ER, and tested for everything.
We visited him and his condition was okay, not the best, still extremely tired, but did not pass out again.
The next day another visit, and he's doing better, but had involuntary hand shaking when holding an object.
He was transferred out of the ER 15 hours later into the hospital.
At that time we found out his heart or part of his heart was enlarged and causing problems.
Now he's being transferred again to a larger hospital with better equipment to help him get better.
We got to talk on the phone, it was about visiting hours, and about how good the food was at this specific hospital compared to the one was was at previously before.
He was going to get a cath lab done, we didn't want to bother him during all of this, so it was decided that we would visit him tomorrow.
This would be the last phone call, the last time I get to speak with him.
30 minutes after our call, a nurse told us to come to the hospital as he took a turn for the worse.
We got there, nurses and doctors attempted to resuscitate for an hour, but he was already gone.
Heart failure due to an enlarged heart caused by untreated high blood pressure since at a young age...
For 4 years, my brother's life had been going downhill filled with misfortune.
But during those 4 years, our connection became stronger because of FFXIV.
We talked a lot more about the game and held various discussions and strategies.
Not just ingame, but outside of gaming too.
We enjoyed lots of things, went on hikes, walked out dogs, ate good food, expanded our hobbies, and just had fun.
I am thankful towards the FFXIV dev team.
The game had such a wonderful story each expansion was different and unique.
The references brought back a lot of memories for him.
The game itself reunited his friends.
And it helped him get out of depression.
The different communities are fantastic and friendly!
Feel in love with hunt trains and had fun in eureka and pvp.
Eventually he found out about dj parties in PF!
Each community made the game so much more alive.
Everything if ran and organized by the players and it is amazing to see everyone come together to achieve something as a whole.
To Tyrn's friends, I am sorry you had to find out so late.
I don't know if you had any plans to play Dawntrail together, but if you did, please enjoy it to the fullest without this weight.
Just writing this was difficult, I ended up writing this in small segments each time.
I apologize for any grammar error and odd segments.
His funeral is tomorrow on the the 16th of July, I want to also get this posted to send off his character too.
I can't even touch FFXIV right now, and I don't feel like playing it anymore.
We were suppose to start out new adventure together, but with him gone, I can't even log in, it's just not the same.
I wished I could have been a better brother during this time of need.
He was there for everyone, but I wasn't there to help him.
His symptoms, I wish I could have rushed him to the ER sooner, but his wishes was that he doesn't want to go to the doctors.
I should have just forced him; so many things I could have done better to make our bond better from the start.
But it's too late now.
I am not looking for support or sympathy.
I just want him and his character to rest and be remember.
To let the community know he loves that you, that everyone is the best and made the gaming environment the most enjoyable!
To let any dev team members and localization team members should they come across this, that you've made such an amazing game bringing joy to all.
Thank you for giving Tyrn the best adventure he had!
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Continue reading...
His funeral is tomorrow, and it's been difficult brining up this topic.
He introduced me to the world of online gaming and even bought me my first PC to play games together.
On Christmas 2015, he introduced me to FFXIV.
Together, we've had so much fun and made many memories back in 2.X
The most notable fun we had was just messing around in T9 as a 4 man party.
He loved the Aurum Vale dungeon and the World of Darkness alliance raid, as well as the Coils.
They were challenging back then and were a lot of fun!
Eventually he stopped playing while I continued on for a while.
Come the Shadowbringers expansion, I got to reintroduce FFXIV to him and on his birthday, a brand new gaming computer.
He was depressed, had to put his dog, Arctic, down (old age, memory loss, in pain, and could no longer stand), and was going through a lot of things during this time as well.
FFXIV helped with the depression, and eventually we (he) got a new dog, Mystik, a rescue, she (Mystik) rescued him brining him out of depression fully!
Tyrn Ashenshield (Halicarnassus), is his ingame character.
It was a completely different game back then in 2.X and there are so many new jobs now.
Because I had been playing for a while, I got to teach and give some pointers to him as he did when I first joined.
Together, we started our adventure once again.
Playing through each expansion, he loved the combat, the more challenging, the better.
He loved the stories, from MSQ to the Side Quests and even the seasonal and collaboration events, each quest is enjoyable and contained so much information.
He loved the Easter eggs, referencing the other Final Fantasy games, reminding him of adventures and the fun and the love he had for Final Fantasy.
And he loved the community, so many communities from the hunts to pvp to eureka and even random ones found in party finder, it made the game fun connecting so many people together.
During the Shadowbringers expansion, he found out that some of his irl friends also played FFXIV.
They were once again reunited and together a new chapter, a new adventure had started.
He use to play PLD, and came to love and have fun playing as a MCH as his main.
All the other jobs were enjoyable, but he had the most fun as a MCH.
The Nier raids are one of his favorites, he loved it!
Having so much fun and no longer depressed, he enjoyed everything!
Endwalker is now about to be released soon.
Everyone decided we form a new FC on Dynamis so we could all be part of the same FC.
Eventually he purchased a personal home for the first time and decorated it with references from our first FC we made together when he rejoined.
He had fun and enjoyed every moment of the game and the company he had with the FC, all the way to the end.
Sadly life is cruel.
It was during this time, that he was diagnosed with a type of rare nasal cancer.
Being misdiagnosed at first as his doctor thought it was allergies.
Allergies causing inflammation in his nose, but allergy medication was not working.
It wasn't going away and appeared to get a lot larger, and now a biosy was done, and it was a tumor.
He got referred to a specialist to get the cancer removed and treated.
During this time, we got another rescue dog, Dakota, and he fell in love with him (Dakota).
A few months later it was time to get it removed and by then the tumor had protruded out of his nostril.
Radiation therapy was done later on to prevent the cancer from relapsing.
After surgery and radiation therapy, he never became the same again.
Weakened and had less energy, but still had the love for FFXIV even when he was in a care facility.
Being at home now, he can enjoy Endwalker to its fullest!
He fell in love with Eureka and Island Sanctuary and always had a blast when it comes to Hunt Trains.
Glamours became something that needed to be worked on, it was a never ending quest to find that perfect single piece of armor.
At the end of Endwalker, it is such an outstanding expansion, we don't even know if the next expansion could beat it.
One of the best games that he has ever played!
Getting updated about Dawntrial, we became excited and can't wait to start a brand new adventure.
He fell ill again, with walking pneumonia for about 2 months.
Again, it was misdiagnosed by his doctor, thinking it was just a cold (that lasted for a month now).
Cough medication did nothing, and he went in again, this time getting X-Rayed and diagnosed with walking pneumonia.
Treatment went well, but on top of still being weakened by the cancer treatment, he was also fighting an infection in the lungs.
His body healing slowly, he's even more tired and can't do much, but even still the love for FFXIV was unwavering.
The updates about Dawntrail got him even more excited, seeing sneak peaks on new jobs, new zones, new dungeons, new races, and a new adventure.
Still excited, but he became weaker all of a sudden.
Being unable to concentrate.
Feeling tried and lethargic.
Being unable to sleep and having insomnia.
Being unable to lie down on his own bed, he resorted to sleeping on his chair or couch while sitting.
This went on for a good while, until he finally visited his doctor.
A new symptom occurred, swollen legs.
His doctor mentioned the swollen legs was due to sleeping while sitting for a long period of time.
And the fatigue to be vitamin D deficiency and recovery from the walking pneumonia.
He was treated with a diuretic and vitamin D supplement.
But during this when all of this was happening, he could no longer concentrate to play FFXIV.
Couldn't do much of anything without getting extremely tired, and could not walk properly too.
For about a week, two weeks, he got some what better.
And then the symptoms came back even worse.
Thinking he got sick, he tried to avoid family members so that we don't contract what he got just in case it was transmissible.
This was during the week Dawntrail early access was to be released.
He can't even play FFXIV anymore, not enough energy and can't keep concentration, but excited to continue his adventure when he got better.
On the day before early access, he collapsed outside in the backyward alone.
No one knew until he regained consciousness and went back inside to get treated for his injuries.
He went to get cleaned up by taking a shower, that was when he collapsed again, in the shower.
This time, I had to call emergency services while our mother stayed by his side.
A possible seizure this time, non convulsive, tense body, and hyperventilating.
At that time we didn't know what was going on other than he passed out twice.
Thankfully he regained consciousness right before fire department arrived.
Rushed to the ER, and tested for everything.
We visited him and his condition was okay, not the best, still extremely tired, but did not pass out again.
The next day another visit, and he's doing better, but had involuntary hand shaking when holding an object.
He was transferred out of the ER 15 hours later into the hospital.
At that time we found out his heart or part of his heart was enlarged and causing problems.
Now he's being transferred again to a larger hospital with better equipment to help him get better.
We got to talk on the phone, it was about visiting hours, and about how good the food was at this specific hospital compared to the one was was at previously before.
He was going to get a cath lab done, we didn't want to bother him during all of this, so it was decided that we would visit him tomorrow.
This would be the last phone call, the last time I get to speak with him.
30 minutes after our call, a nurse told us to come to the hospital as he took a turn for the worse.
We got there, nurses and doctors attempted to resuscitate for an hour, but he was already gone.
Heart failure due to an enlarged heart caused by untreated high blood pressure since at a young age...
For 4 years, my brother's life had been going downhill filled with misfortune.
But during those 4 years, our connection became stronger because of FFXIV.
We talked a lot more about the game and held various discussions and strategies.
Not just ingame, but outside of gaming too.
We enjoyed lots of things, went on hikes, walked out dogs, ate good food, expanded our hobbies, and just had fun.
I am thankful towards the FFXIV dev team.
The game had such a wonderful story each expansion was different and unique.
The references brought back a lot of memories for him.
The game itself reunited his friends.
And it helped him get out of depression.
The different communities are fantastic and friendly!
Feel in love with hunt trains and had fun in eureka and pvp.
Eventually he found out about dj parties in PF!
Each community made the game so much more alive.
Everything if ran and organized by the players and it is amazing to see everyone come together to achieve something as a whole.
To Tyrn's friends, I am sorry you had to find out so late.
I don't know if you had any plans to play Dawntrail together, but if you did, please enjoy it to the fullest without this weight.
Just writing this was difficult, I ended up writing this in small segments each time.
I apologize for any grammar error and odd segments.
His funeral is tomorrow on the the 16th of July, I want to also get this posted to send off his character too.
I can't even touch FFXIV right now, and I don't feel like playing it anymore.
We were suppose to start out new adventure together, but with him gone, I can't even log in, it's just not the same.
I wished I could have been a better brother during this time of need.
He was there for everyone, but I wasn't there to help him.
His symptoms, I wish I could have rushed him to the ER sooner, but his wishes was that he doesn't want to go to the doctors.
I should have just forced him; so many things I could have done better to make our bond better from the start.
But it's too late now.
I am not looking for support or sympathy.
I just want him and his character to rest and be remember.
To let the community know he loves that you, that everyone is the best and made the gaming environment the most enjoyable!
To let any dev team members and localization team members should they come across this, that you've made such an amazing game bringing joy to all.
Thank you for giving Tyrn the best adventure he had!
- Tsuki
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