I did all the DRK quests ARR would allow as soon as they opened up, so I already knew he’d lost his hometown and family to Nidhogg and was very angry about it. I didn’t think any more about it, other than when I’d have to fight him again, because I was positive that was coming.
Then I finished that part of the game. Urianger and Yugiri weren’t going to stay with me, and Tataru, Twelve bless her, couldn’t fight her way out of a paper bag. I was sure everybody else was dead (when I slacked off on playing, somebody I know in real life eventually went “oh FFS” and showed me some of the squad in a Shadowbringers trailer). I was waiting for Haurchefant to mistreat my WoL, because his offer HAD to have a catch, and Alphinaud was dead to me... actually, to this day I’m still waiting for him to apologize to me for getting me into that, or treat me like I have my own feelings instead of as an extension of him. Anyway, I felt alone. And homeless, helpless, sad... and angry. And like revenge was the only thing I had left. I couldn’t figure out how to get at the Ascians all by my lonesome, and I couldn’t figure out how I would get into Ul’dah and break the necks of everybody who backstabbed me, but hey, I had decided earlier that I was going to smite some dragons to spite Midgardsormr, and now I had nothing else to do.
Fast forward some, I learn the truth about the dragons and don’t want to kill them any more. I finally do fight Nidhogg and find less schadenfreude in it than I thought I would, even though the Eye chose me and I thought my whole existence revolved around ending him. Life does not end up being just the blood-soaked hell I expected first going into the city. I don’t have to think of only revenge (I’m still coming for van Hydrus and the other Ascians though), I have friends. Or, as a character I love from another story I love puts it:
Estinien... is me! His anger is my anger!
And his chilling out is my chilling out, and his snark is my snark... man, the snark, he had made me nervous at first, but I really started to like him during the road trip Alphinaud forced us on. Man said so many things I wished I could say.
And from what he says in the infirmary... that means Nidhogg might have been me too. I sat quietly for a moment or two when I thought about that.
I don’t know if the devs did that on purpose or I just got too emotionally invested in this game, but I thought it was brilliant.
Continue reading...
Then I finished that part of the game. Urianger and Yugiri weren’t going to stay with me, and Tataru, Twelve bless her, couldn’t fight her way out of a paper bag. I was sure everybody else was dead (when I slacked off on playing, somebody I know in real life eventually went “oh FFS” and showed me some of the squad in a Shadowbringers trailer). I was waiting for Haurchefant to mistreat my WoL, because his offer HAD to have a catch, and Alphinaud was dead to me... actually, to this day I’m still waiting for him to apologize to me for getting me into that, or treat me like I have my own feelings instead of as an extension of him. Anyway, I felt alone. And homeless, helpless, sad... and angry. And like revenge was the only thing I had left. I couldn’t figure out how to get at the Ascians all by my lonesome, and I couldn’t figure out how I would get into Ul’dah and break the necks of everybody who backstabbed me, but hey, I had decided earlier that I was going to smite some dragons to spite Midgardsormr, and now I had nothing else to do.
Fast forward some, I learn the truth about the dragons and don’t want to kill them any more. I finally do fight Nidhogg and find less schadenfreude in it than I thought I would, even though the Eye chose me and I thought my whole existence revolved around ending him. Life does not end up being just the blood-soaked hell I expected first going into the city. I don’t have to think of only revenge (I’m still coming for van Hydrus and the other Ascians though), I have friends. Or, as a character I love from another story I love puts it:
Estinien... is me! His anger is my anger!
And his chilling out is my chilling out, and his snark is my snark... man, the snark, he had made me nervous at first, but I really started to like him during the road trip Alphinaud forced us on. Man said so many things I wished I could say.
And from what he says in the infirmary... that means Nidhogg might have been me too. I sat quietly for a moment or two when I thought about that.
I don’t know if the devs did that on purpose or I just got too emotionally invested in this game, but I thought it was brilliant.
Continue reading...