Hiya, longtime lurker, I think first time poster here. 
I finally got a story I think is worth sharing here.
My friend Lilith (a Hyur Dragoon) and I were powerleveling my Au Ra Monk through dungeons for glam-related reasons, and we do a run of Stone Vigil. We run into a pair of players, who I'll call Mike and Sara. Mike was a Hyur Gunbreaker and Sara was a Lalafell White Mage. As a habit I tend to look at the gear of my allies to know what to expect going in, and while Mike had straight level 60 items, Sara was a bit lopsided; 20s and 30s on her left and single-digit level accessories on her right.
That said, they both played kinda well given their circumstances, being both clearly new and in Sara's case, a bit undergeared. I'm a WHM main myself, and while I could tell she was Cure-spamming to keep up, she was managing to keep all of us alive even when Mike accidentally pulled too much. Told her as such right after the first boss when all of us had a breather.
Me: Yo Sara! Great job on healing, but you definitely wanna look into upgrading your accessories!
Lilith: ^
Ultimately, we wound up wiping just past the second boss where a bunch of Ice Sprites spawned along with the three or so Dragon Aevises (Aevi? Aevis? EVIL THINGS!) we were working on killing. Mike goes down, my Mantra goes down, Sara tries hardcasting Raise as Lilith and I go down, and well, it was a wipe.
Mike: woops
Mike: didn't mean for the ice boys to spawn
Lilith: Swiftcast - Raise
Sara disconnected at this time, and Mike had to BRB; it's fine, RL always comes first; apparently Sara's internet went out but soon enough we were back on a roll and we eventually beat the boss with a clutch LB after both Mike and Sara went down at about 25% health.
Sara and Lilith leave after the GGs are exchanged, I'm looking out of game and come back to this:
Mike: yo
Mike: be nicer to new players pls
Be nicer? I don't recall Lilith or I ever being rude? We trade barbs with each other on voice call as any salt mage and their tank is wont to do, but we never said anything less than nice things and a bit of constructive criticism towards them. Check my backlog, yeah, what was said above was literally the whole content of party chat.
Me: ?
Mike: she literally got off because you made her feel like shit
Mike: brighten up
Mike: you and the other dude literally said shit back to back
Me: Yeah, we weren't being mean
Me: I told her she was doing great, but she could upgrade her accessory
Mike: Say one thing and that's it
Mike: don't gang up on her
Me: We're not?
Mike: bro
At that point I jumped out of the dungeon, not wanting to deal with someone who was either doing a gigantic troll or was really upset for some reason I couldn't figure out. That said, I know the feeling of having other people tell you you're not doing something right and it kinda sucks, especially when you're trying your best. And I could tell that Sara was absolutely doing that - one doesn't run Stone Vigil with lv. 1 accessories and underleveled armor and NOT wipe constantly unless you're trying your hardest.
I have all my crafters leveled to max so I could help my friends gear up as they worked through MSQ, and hey, World Visit's a thing. Might not mean much, but at the very least to help them out I could get Sara geared and maybe apologize if I did in fact come off too rough.
I try sending a tell to Mike - no dice, definitely blocked. Sent one to Sara, same deal. Damn... I could've left it there, but I wanted to at least reach out and try talking one more time. We're supposed to be nice and help each other, yeah?
I send a friend request to Sara - success! Time to talk to her!
Me: Hey! I just want to say you did REALLY well in Stone Vigil with the gear you had! I'm sorry if me or the other guy hurt your feelings, but we didn't say anything that was mean. As a WHM main, I know it can be hard to keep up, especially when you don't have the best gear. So if you'd like I'd be happy to come over to your server and craft you some.
Sara: it did hurt my feelings a bit but being truthful, you were both right, i'm still learning this and i guess i just assume that i will have the gear i need through questing and such.
Sara: I don't have the money to pay you to craft anything sorry but ty for the offer.
Me: Hey, I didn't ask for a price!
I'm more than happy to do it for free!
Me: It
Me: It's why I leveled my crafters after all!
Sara: that would be awesome thank you
Hey, success! A perfectly reasonable assumption, sadly not entirely backed up by what she had, but that can be fixed! And hey, if she wants some more runs leveling, I can help with that too, I still needed to put some more levels on my Monk.
Me: If you'd like you could party with me and my friend, we're leveling ourselves.
Sara: could my son come too? he was the tank in the party
Me: Sure! Where do you want to meet up?
Sara: gridania
Me: On our way!
A mother/son duo playing together? That was so cool - and suddenly it made a lot more sense why Mike was so defensive of Sara! She was probably overwhelmed in the moment and well, I could see near anyone getting infuriated at seeing that.
Turns out as we suspected, both were new - Mike had some experience as Gunbreaker, but mainly picked it up for the Superbolide memes and was more at home with Samurai, while Sara was absolutely new and working through MSQ. Thankfully both Lilith and I could help out; while I could fit out Sara with HQ gear and give her tips on White Mage, I know about squat about Gunbreaker - but Lilith having all combat classes at 80 and loving tanking was more than up to walking Mike through the basics.
We did another run through Stone Vigil and it was a massive improvement; Sara was healing well enough that none of us were in any danger of dying, and could even start learning how and when to do damage in between heals. Mike began learning how to use cooldowns appropriately, and what had started as silence and miscommunication turned to hostility turned out super wholesome in the end.
I wanted to post this because it reminds me of how dismissive we can be of people telling us what to do, or people being hostile for seemingly no reason. I can't speak for everyone, but new players, it's okay to open up and ask questions on how to do things, even in chat! Learning's never a bad thing, and whoever's telling you that's being a jerk! Take a bit of time to figure out if they're trying to be helpful or if they're being jerks before jumping to a conclusion.
And for us veterans, not every undergeared player is some idiot who's rolling their face on the keyboard and expecting to be carried. Sometimes they didn't grasp the mechanics or tutorials or whatever the game was telling them, and need a bit more help, and we all could do more to keep that in mind. Hell, I remember when I had to be told to start using Medica and Medica II - I, you, all of us veterans were once a Mike or Sara, and we had someone help us out. Let's make sure to pay it forward. Who knows, maybe the new guys who seem hostile have a far more understandable reason to be upset in context.
Sorry for the long post but I hope you all enjoy. Sadly I logged off shortly after our second Stone Vigil run, so I don't have screenshots, only the text I copy/pasted to discuss with friends. See you all around!
submitted by /u/GundamPharmacist
[link] [comments]
Continue reading...
I finally got a story I think is worth sharing here.My friend Lilith (a Hyur Dragoon) and I were powerleveling my Au Ra Monk through dungeons for glam-related reasons, and we do a run of Stone Vigil. We run into a pair of players, who I'll call Mike and Sara. Mike was a Hyur Gunbreaker and Sara was a Lalafell White Mage. As a habit I tend to look at the gear of my allies to know what to expect going in, and while Mike had straight level 60 items, Sara was a bit lopsided; 20s and 30s on her left and single-digit level accessories on her right.
That said, they both played kinda well given their circumstances, being both clearly new and in Sara's case, a bit undergeared. I'm a WHM main myself, and while I could tell she was Cure-spamming to keep up, she was managing to keep all of us alive even when Mike accidentally pulled too much. Told her as such right after the first boss when all of us had a breather.
Me: Yo Sara! Great job on healing, but you definitely wanna look into upgrading your accessories!
Lilith: ^
Ultimately, we wound up wiping just past the second boss where a bunch of Ice Sprites spawned along with the three or so Dragon Aevises (Aevi? Aevis? EVIL THINGS!) we were working on killing. Mike goes down, my Mantra goes down, Sara tries hardcasting Raise as Lilith and I go down, and well, it was a wipe.
Mike: woops
Mike: didn't mean for the ice boys to spawn
Lilith: Swiftcast - Raise
Sara disconnected at this time, and Mike had to BRB; it's fine, RL always comes first; apparently Sara's internet went out but soon enough we were back on a roll and we eventually beat the boss with a clutch LB after both Mike and Sara went down at about 25% health.
Sara and Lilith leave after the GGs are exchanged, I'm looking out of game and come back to this:
Mike: yo
Mike: be nicer to new players pls
Be nicer? I don't recall Lilith or I ever being rude? We trade barbs with each other on voice call as any salt mage and their tank is wont to do, but we never said anything less than nice things and a bit of constructive criticism towards them. Check my backlog, yeah, what was said above was literally the whole content of party chat.
Me: ?
Mike: she literally got off because you made her feel like shit
Mike: brighten up
Mike: you and the other dude literally said shit back to back
Me: Yeah, we weren't being mean
Me: I told her she was doing great, but she could upgrade her accessory
Mike: Say one thing and that's it
Mike: don't gang up on her
Me: We're not?
Mike: bro
At that point I jumped out of the dungeon, not wanting to deal with someone who was either doing a gigantic troll or was really upset for some reason I couldn't figure out. That said, I know the feeling of having other people tell you you're not doing something right and it kinda sucks, especially when you're trying your best. And I could tell that Sara was absolutely doing that - one doesn't run Stone Vigil with lv. 1 accessories and underleveled armor and NOT wipe constantly unless you're trying your hardest.
I have all my crafters leveled to max so I could help my friends gear up as they worked through MSQ, and hey, World Visit's a thing. Might not mean much, but at the very least to help them out I could get Sara geared and maybe apologize if I did in fact come off too rough.
I try sending a tell to Mike - no dice, definitely blocked. Sent one to Sara, same deal. Damn... I could've left it there, but I wanted to at least reach out and try talking one more time. We're supposed to be nice and help each other, yeah?
I send a friend request to Sara - success! Time to talk to her!
Me: Hey! I just want to say you did REALLY well in Stone Vigil with the gear you had! I'm sorry if me or the other guy hurt your feelings, but we didn't say anything that was mean. As a WHM main, I know it can be hard to keep up, especially when you don't have the best gear. So if you'd like I'd be happy to come over to your server and craft you some.
Sara: it did hurt my feelings a bit but being truthful, you were both right, i'm still learning this and i guess i just assume that i will have the gear i need through questing and such.
Sara: I don't have the money to pay you to craft anything sorry but ty for the offer.
Me: Hey, I didn't ask for a price!
I'm more than happy to do it for free!Me: It
Me: It's why I leveled my crafters after all!
Sara: that would be awesome thank you
Hey, success! A perfectly reasonable assumption, sadly not entirely backed up by what she had, but that can be fixed! And hey, if she wants some more runs leveling, I can help with that too, I still needed to put some more levels on my Monk.
Me: If you'd like you could party with me and my friend, we're leveling ourselves.
Sara: could my son come too? he was the tank in the party
Me: Sure! Where do you want to meet up?
Sara: gridania
Me: On our way!
A mother/son duo playing together? That was so cool - and suddenly it made a lot more sense why Mike was so defensive of Sara! She was probably overwhelmed in the moment and well, I could see near anyone getting infuriated at seeing that.
Turns out as we suspected, both were new - Mike had some experience as Gunbreaker, but mainly picked it up for the Superbolide memes and was more at home with Samurai, while Sara was absolutely new and working through MSQ. Thankfully both Lilith and I could help out; while I could fit out Sara with HQ gear and give her tips on White Mage, I know about squat about Gunbreaker - but Lilith having all combat classes at 80 and loving tanking was more than up to walking Mike through the basics.
We did another run through Stone Vigil and it was a massive improvement; Sara was healing well enough that none of us were in any danger of dying, and could even start learning how and when to do damage in between heals. Mike began learning how to use cooldowns appropriately, and what had started as silence and miscommunication turned to hostility turned out super wholesome in the end.
I wanted to post this because it reminds me of how dismissive we can be of people telling us what to do, or people being hostile for seemingly no reason. I can't speak for everyone, but new players, it's okay to open up and ask questions on how to do things, even in chat! Learning's never a bad thing, and whoever's telling you that's being a jerk! Take a bit of time to figure out if they're trying to be helpful or if they're being jerks before jumping to a conclusion.
And for us veterans, not every undergeared player is some idiot who's rolling their face on the keyboard and expecting to be carried. Sometimes they didn't grasp the mechanics or tutorials or whatever the game was telling them, and need a bit more help, and we all could do more to keep that in mind. Hell, I remember when I had to be told to start using Medica and Medica II - I, you, all of us veterans were once a Mike or Sara, and we had someone help us out. Let's make sure to pay it forward. Who knows, maybe the new guys who seem hostile have a far more understandable reason to be upset in context.
Sorry for the long post but I hope you all enjoy. Sadly I logged off shortly after our second Stone Vigil run, so I don't have screenshots, only the text I copy/pasted to discuss with friends. See you all around!
submitted by /u/GundamPharmacist
[link] [comments]
Continue reading...